Coming Out
by MusingCalliope
Summary: A story involving Remus, Sirius, a closet, and an indignant Gilderoy.


Title: Coming Out

Pairing: Remus/Sirius, James/Lily, Gilderoy/Mafalda

Rating: PG-13

Notes: Funny how boring school subjects can cause one's mind to wander.

- - -

"Pssht, quiet! They'll be here any minute!" Remus hissed.

"I know, I know, but they're taking too bloody long, so can't we just – OW! WHAT THE BLOODY HELL'D YOU DO THAT FOR– " Sirius' roar was silenced by a hand clapped over his mouth.

"Honestly, Sirius, one would think you would have the self-control to keep your– "

"Yes, yes, all right," Sirius cut him off. His indignant pout was lost in the utter blackness.

"Just... I thought... It's not that easy, you know, what with you pressing me up against this wall." He reached out blindly until he felt the smooth surface of what he decided was Remus' cheek. He brushed it with his fingertips before letting his hand slide down to rest on the small of his back.

Remus' sharp intake of breath caused a grin to break out on Sirius' face.

"Well then, Mr. Self-Control," he smirked, "you'd better turn around."

He could practically hear the other boy's eyes widen in the dark.

"You can't go jumping out of a closet arse first, you twat."

- - -

The door was flung open but caught before it smashed into the wall. Lily flew into the room, pulling James after her. The door was slammed shut behind her as she pulled the unobjecting James against her by his shirt collar, leaning against the door. His hands found her hips as his mouth connected with hers, her tongue slipping between his lips. James let out an involuntary groan and pressed closer, stopping only to utter a whispered, "Love you," before going back to kissing her.

- - -

Both boys froze at the sound of an opening door. The sound of it shutting, closely followed by muffled groans, nearly sent Sirius into a hysteric fit of giggles. As it was, he only managed half a snort before Remus elbowed him in the ribs.

- - -

Lily brought one hand up to brush the hair off James' forehead, the other one quickly unbuttoning his shirt and loosening his tie. James locked his arms around her waist and began to shuffle backwards toward one of the large four-posters in the room. The edge of the mattress hit the backs of his knees, causing him to sit down. Lily hitched up her skirt and climbed onto his lap, knees on either side of his legs. She kissed him again, her fingers beginning to unbutton her own shirt after finishing with his.

- - -

The noises on the other side of the door grew louder. Sirius stood shifting his weight impatiently from one foot to the other. When the moans were joined by the sound of bedsprings creaking, he leaned over Remus' shoulder and exclaimed (albeit quietly), "Oy! Are we going to let them go the whole bloody way before we make an appearance? Come on!" 

Remus turned slightly. "Right. On the count – on MY count – of three, we go. You ready?" Sirius nodded eagerly in response, before remembering Remus couldn't see him. 

"Yes, yes, hurry it up," he whispered excitedly. His fingers twitched at his sides as Remus began to murmur, "One... Two..."

- - -

Lily sat up abruptly at a roar and several shrieks that seemed to be coming from one of the neighbouring rooms. James raised himself up on his elbows as Lily scrambled off him and helped him to his feet. They hurriedly fumbled with the buttons on their shirts as they rushed out into the corridor and burst through the door on the other side of the hallway. Gilderoy Lockhart's booming voice met them the instant they walked in.

"– AND A HORRID INTRUSION OF OUR PRIVACY! DON'T THINK THAT YOUR BEING A PREFECT WILL LET YOU GET AWAY WITH THIS, MR. LUPIN! AS FOR YOU, MR. BLACK– " Gilderoy abruptly stopped when he noticed they had company. Lily and James attempted to take stock of the situation as Gilderoy set in on them.

"Mr. Potter! Did you have anything to do with this! And Miss EVANS! What do you THINK you're doing, rushing about with your shirt unbuttoned in such a manner! Why, I'd– "

Behind Gilderoy on one of the four-poster beds sat a very rumpled and very infuriated Mafalda Hopkirk, the bedclothes clutched to her chest, trying to cover herself up and watch Gilderoy with obvious adoration at the same time. On the floor in front of an open closet by the foot of the bed lay two very tangled, very confused, very loudly cursing boys.

"...Sirius? ...REMUS?" James exclaimed, ignoring the huffing Gilderoy. "What in the bloody hell got into your heads to make you want to spy on these two?!"

An arm was quickly raised into the air from the tangled bunch, accompanied by a muffled shout from Sirius, "Wasn't spying on them! Got the wrong room! Was going to spy on – OW!" Remus got to his feet, brushing off his robes. 

"Terribly sorry," he apologized, kicking the bundle of Black on the floor, who let out a giggle before getting to his feet as well. Pulling Sirius with him – who was desperately trying to suppress his giggles – Remus swiftly walked towards the door. Gilderoy, who had been stunned into silence, now started up again. "DON'T YOU DARE WALK OUT OF HERE! I'LL BE GOING TO MCGONAGALL WITH THIS, I– "

"Won't happen again," Remus cut him off brightly. "Mr. Lockhart, Miss Hopkirk," he nodded curtly, before dragging Sirius, who was now roaring with laughter, along with a very bewildered James and Lily, with him out of the room. The door shut on Gilderoy's last threats of suspension and general shame and bad reputations.

Letting go of Sirius, he looked at Lily and James, apparently undecided as to what he should say. "Got the wrong room," he said at last, before taking Sirius by the arm again and leading him down the hall. He turned a last time before going around the corner. "Any 'coming out of the closet' jokes issue from this, and neither of you will ever see daylight again."

Sirius' guffaws, soon joined by loud snorts of laughter that were decisively Remus', echoed down the hall back to the very wide-eyed, still very dishevelled couple left standing outside the dorm rooms.


End file.
